I got this idea from another blog since I don't have time or patience to write a more traditional post. I don't know how I will like it since being a novelist is in my blood, so we'll see how it goes.
1) I am now 30 years old. So now what happens? Must I begin thinking about if or when I will reproduce? Will my eggs begin slowing down their production soon? Does it really matter? (No.)
2) I haven't been on a date in 2 1/2 years. Ugh. That is a hard one to type to the world. I've never had any great luck with guys, unfortunately. The date I went on 2 1/2 years ago didn't end so well, either. Probably won't call him up for another.
3) I am fat. Ouch. But it's true. I am approximately 40 lbs. overweight. I felt like such a blob during my recent vacation in Taiwan, and vowed to come home and try losing weight again. I really do want to be thin. I don't feel like myself inside this body. Maybe this is why I haven't dated in so long?
4) The doctor who took an x-ray on my ankle last night told me that I had "remarkably soft feet." I giggled and said it must be the result of mud bathing and the fish pool experience in Taiwan. Then I wondered why he couldn't have been 30 years younger and single (not out loud, of course).
5) I probably will not travel overseas again for a long time. I don't like being on the plane a long time because I can't sleep, which adversely affects how I feel upon landing and days after. It took me at least four days to get over my jet lag, which was about half of the vacation.
6) I never totally let loose on this blog because I am paranoid about who is reading it. I only have three readers signed up as "followers," but it doesn't mean that no one else reads this. And since I still haven't completely broken the habit of allowing others' opinions influence my mood and feelings, I think of that when I write in here.
7) Life would probably be easier if I would take medication, but I refuse. Been there, done that, not interested in going back unless my life depends on it. There are things about my life that taking a pill will not change; only I can change them or change the way I feel about them.
8) When I was younger, I pictured so many things to be different by now. That sentence sounds a little awkward. It must be the lingering jet lag affecting my grammar.
Sorry, I had to stop after 8. Not sure this style is for me, but at least I gave it a try. :)
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Jill, I found your blog through your comment on 344pounds. I feel like you and I are very similar. I totally identify with numbers 2, 3, 6, 7, and 8, and partially with number one as well (seeing as I'm male and don't produce eggs). I've spent my entire adult life (and my teens as well) struggling with obesity, depression, loneliness, etc. I'm not sure you are at the point where you are ready to change your life, but it can be done. And you don't have to do it all at one time. You can do one thing at a time and do it slowly and really focus on it. I quit smoking 3 years ago, I started losing weight earlier this year, and next I'll be working on the relationship thing. It's slow and very difficult, but I'm doing it despite what I thought was possible. You can read my blog to see what I'm doing health-wise. I don't really talk too much about my personal life on there (see number 6 above), but you can always email me if you have questions or need encouragement or advice.
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